as per usual, i've been reading more and more about autism and different strategies used to help with... well anything! the latest has been Temple Grandin's "The Way I See It". all in all i think it is an excellent resource. but i only got about halfway through and decided to put it down.
i found myself becoming really hard on myself and starting to doubt everything i was doing. not only that, i was becoming really worried about Xander and his future. it was starting to feel like everything was just coming down and a future where Xander could enjoy friends or a career, etc., was looking bleak. even though i know now that that is a totally crazy way to think.
so i decided to stop reading.
i know he will have a hard time socially. it tugs at my heart when i see him trying to talk to other kids and not see anything in his face or eyes beyond a script he reciting. but he tries so hard and wants to do it, and that will be all the difference for him. it is hard to watch him not understand simple social nuances that most other pre-schoolers understand.
but at the very core of Xander is a sweet, gentle and loving little boy who is truly trying his hardest to cope with his autism.
it is nice to receive a vote of confidence, but i am not a perfect mom. i am harder on Xander than maybe i need to be and have high expectations, so there are days that can be really terrible. there are some things that i don't tolerate at home.... PERIOD. so some days it is a battle of the wills from the moment we get out of bed. Xander may be totally inflexible at times, but so am i. we use the phrase "bendy brain" to let Xander know he needs to be more flexible. so now Xander is starting to tell me to have a "bendy brain" when i'm not allowing him to do something. touché.
now it is Xander's turn to type something. we are going to "take turns like team work" at Xander's request.
sqweeytxandersvccxczszswswesssssszmomvcfderfdaddynbvcxzlkjjhggffddssaapoiuytrewq
good teamwork. that was all Xander.
i found myself becoming really hard on myself and starting to doubt everything i was doing. not only that, i was becoming really worried about Xander and his future. it was starting to feel like everything was just coming down and a future where Xander could enjoy friends or a career, etc., was looking bleak. even though i know now that that is a totally crazy way to think.
so i decided to stop reading.
i know he will have a hard time socially. it tugs at my heart when i see him trying to talk to other kids and not see anything in his face or eyes beyond a script he reciting. but he tries so hard and wants to do it, and that will be all the difference for him. it is hard to watch him not understand simple social nuances that most other pre-schoolers understand.
but at the very core of Xander is a sweet, gentle and loving little boy who is truly trying his hardest to cope with his autism.
it is nice to receive a vote of confidence, but i am not a perfect mom. i am harder on Xander than maybe i need to be and have high expectations, so there are days that can be really terrible. there are some things that i don't tolerate at home.... PERIOD. so some days it is a battle of the wills from the moment we get out of bed. Xander may be totally inflexible at times, but so am i. we use the phrase "bendy brain" to let Xander know he needs to be more flexible. so now Xander is starting to tell me to have a "bendy brain" when i'm not allowing him to do something. touché.
now it is Xander's turn to type something. we are going to "take turns like team work" at Xander's request.
sqweeytxandersvccxczszswswesssssszmomvcfderfdaddynbvcxzlkjjhggffddssaapoiuytrewq
good teamwork. that was all Xander.
1 comment:
Annie, I love your posts.. you are the best mom for him and he needs you just like you need him! the way I look at things with Ivy and her "Problems" is that she is exactly what I needed in my life , kids come different and thy all teach us something! love ya.
Post a Comment